A Harsh Reminder

I arrived at work this morning to the news that a former employee had passed away over the weekend. It was an unexpected passing. I did not work with him for long, but the sadness in the office at this news has left me feeling off.

This past weekend my boys could not get along. They were constantly arguing and fighting and my husband and I were at our wit's end with them. Tonight, I'll spend a few extra minutes with them as we kiss good night and read bed time stories.

Today, don't hesitate to tell the people you love how much they mean to you. Life is too short.

A Little Crafty

Growing up my mother was always working on a craft project. She was either painting or making hair bows or sewing or scrap booking. I have limited time and limited skills, but every now and then I get a desire to create something.

A few months ago we successfully completed adding a half bath in the house but the walls are still white. We've not done the first thing to try to decorate. After spending too much time trying to figure out what I wanted to do I finally came up with an idea and just went with it.

I gave the boys some blank paper and a set of water color paints and told them to have fun. After I had collected about thirty original pieces of art I got to work.

With a pair of scissors, a big blank canvas, and a bottle of decoupage I was able to create this amazing piece of original art for the bathroom.

And some close up pictures...

I just love it. It was so easy to make and now I have a great piece that preserves the boys art work!

A New Title

My focus lately has been on trying to enjoy the little moments. My boys seem like they are growing up way too fast. The years are going by quicker and quicker. I know I can't slow down time, but I can make sure that I'm enjoy the moments that really matter.

I'm trying to not miss out on what's happening right in front of me because I'm worrying about tomorrow or next week. This is difficult for me. With a demanding job, busy boys, and just the every day happenings of life, I sometimes forget to just enjoy what's right in front of me.

I don't think I'm the only one that feels this way. In talking to my friends that have jobs and small children they constantly comment on how overwhelmed they feel or how busy they are or how tired they are at night.

So I'm trying to look at things differently. I'm trying to not rush through dinner just to get to the bath time and bed time ritual. I'm trying to have meaningful conversations with my children about their day. I'm trying to leave some free time on the weekends so that we can just be lazy and have fun. I'm trying to make sometime for myself so that I have an identity separate from "mom" or "wife".

So, my promise to you, my lonely reader, is that I will share with you the little things that make me happy. And maybe I will inspire you to enjoy a stolen moment instead of rushing through it to get to the next item on your to-do list.

I've got 2 little moments to share with you today.

First, I made homemade granola today. It was my first attempt but I must admit that it is delicious. I can't wait to eat it for breakfast in the morning with some yogurt and fresh fruit.

Second - a walk after dinner with my boys. The kids spent the weekend over at my parents' lake house. My dad dropped them off tonight just in time for dinner. Since the time changed last night I thought we'd take a celebratory walk through the park that is adjacent to our back yard. As we "hiked" through the woods I was reminded of how much fun it is to run free as a child.

And now I must go. It's bed time for the boys which means hugs and kisses and story time.

Good night, and remember, it really is all about the little things.

One Day

One day I know that I will have it all figured out.

One day I know that I will be able to balance work, motherhood, and marriage with little stress.

One day... one day...

But sometimes, it feels like I will never get it all together. I'll have a success at work and an epic fail as a mother. I'll be so patient as a mother that I could be nominated for 'mother of the year' but then pick a horrible fight with my husband for no reason at all. One day I hope I'll figure out the balance.

I often wonder if I'm the only one out there that is actively trying not to get caught up in the rat race of life. I hate the speed of modern society. I really want life to slow down, become simpler, and more enjoyable.

One day...

What A Week

It's Friday evening after a very long and stressful four day work week. I've missed dinner every night this week and two nights I didn't even make it home before the kids bedtime. Work doesn't always keep me away this much, but when weeks like these happen, I miss my boys so much my heart hurts.

I wonder, is this normal?

I love my job. I love the satisfaction that I get out of completing a tough week like this, but then sometimes I have to wonder if it's worth it...

I often tell myself that I would probably go crazy if I stayed home with the boys every day, but is that just something I tell myself to make it easier for me to leave every morning.

This morning as I was ironing my work clothes my littlest Ellis looks as me and asks, "Mommy, you not be long today, right?" I told him I would try my hardest to be home before bedtime. He looked at me with the saddest eyes and said, "Nooooo, you only be gone a little." He brought tears to my eyes.

I don't really have much of a point, but I just wanted to capture this feeling in the pit of my stomach where I am aching for my kids.

Tomorrow it's back to the office for a few hours but I'm going to bring my oldest Owen with me. Even if he's sitting in my office playing his Nintendo 3DS, at least I'll get to see him. (And I've promised everyone that Sunday we will do something extra special.)

A Belated Merry Christmas

It's a little late, but I wanted to take a moment to say Merry Christmas. We had a wonderful holiday. The week before Christmas we headed up to Charlotte, North Carolina with my sister, niece, nephew and parents. We spent a few days at the Great Wolfe Lodge. We had a wonderful visit and the cousins had a wonderful time playing together and swimming.

I love how much these cousins like each other. We had a great time visiting as a family.

My husband will probably hate me for writing this, but he is a NASCAR fan. If there is a race on TV he's watching it. He doesn't have much of a desire to watch a race in person, but if it's on TV it's on at our house. There have been many Sunday afternoons spent with the sounds of the race track in the back ground at our house. Since the race is always on, my boys have grown to really LOVE race cars. When we were in North Carolina we were so close to the Hendrix Motor Sports Museum that we had to check it out.

My mother-in-laws favorite driver, Dale Jr.

Back at home, Christmas day was perfect.

It's become a tradition in our house for the boys to unwrap a new pair of PJs on Christmas Eve.

Santa delivered a Nintendo 3DS, Mario game, and wheel barrel for Owen. Ellis got a new wagon, a basketball set, and "Woody Garbage Truck" (from Toy Story 3).

It was great getting to spend the day with my sister also. I miss her dearly.

After opening presents at our house and having some breakfast we drove over to my parents house in Alabama. We got to spend the afternoon visiting with family. Owen got a new iPod which he's really excited about. Ellis got a skoot bike and a camera. (I think he enjoyed the presents from Nana and Papa more than anything he got from Santa or Ed and I.)

Overall, it was a lovely holiday. I made an extra effort to take some time to just enjoy what was going on around me and I think it was a success. 

Happy belated Christmas!

Enjoying the Holidays (and not rushing through them)!

As the children get older, work gets more demanding, and my extended family moves further away the demands of the holiday season can get overwhelming at times.

This year I'm trying my hardest to just enjoy the time that I have with my family.

A stolen few moments at the local park with the boys...

Time with my parents (even if we bore my dad to sleep)...

And play dates with neighbors that my boys adore...

I'm not stressing about giving 20 holiday presents to my co-workers, but I am sending a hand written personalized card to them. I'm not going to spending 2 days in the kitchen baking holiday goodies, but I'm going to enjoy the 2 hours I got to spend with the kids on Sunday morning baking one batch of cookies. The kids aren't going to have fifteen presents each under the tree this year, but we've picked out five presents that they will LOVE!

We're still going to find time to do some of our family traditions like having a nice Christmas Eve dinner at the house, going ice skating, and driving around at night through downtown looking at the Christmas lights. I know that these moments that we spend together are going to be the memories that the kids have as they grow up.

(And, to be honest, Santa is bringing Owen a Nintendo 3DS, and he's getting an iPod from his grandparents, so it's okay that there a fewer presents under the tree.)

Happy holidays everyone!

Is it really December already?

The fall season has flown by and I'm amazed that December is already here. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving. My family came over to eat and it was delicious.
The boys are doing great and the new job is busy and a challenge, but it's great.
And now, a few of my recent favorite pictures...

A Job Well Done

One of my unfaltering principles that I try to live by is to do the best job possible and you will be rewarded. One of the reasons I was so discouraged when we moved to LA after college is that I felt like you were more likely to succeed in the television industry because of the people that you knew, and not the value of the job you were performing. Does this make sense?

In my professional life I have tried to do the best possible job and have been fortunate to be promoted and given additional responsibilities.

Today, I was promoted to a new position. I'm very excited about my new role. I'll be taking on a bigger leadership role. I'll have more direct reports. And also, for the first time I will have additional managers reporting in to me.

My new role will be a challenge, but I'm very excited about this next chapter in my professional career.

Fall Fun

Fall is my favorite time of year.

Here are a few of my favorite memories from the last few weeks.

Owen playing at the Fall Festival in Centre, AL where his grandparents now live.

We installed the sink in our new half bath that we are adding. (So close to be finished.)

After months of talking about it we finally bought a family pass to the zoo. I love the flamingos!

Fun times at the local corn maze.

We're happy! and life is good.

I'm In Love...

with Ellis' Halloween Costume. (I'm working on a homemade Chicken outfit! It's almost finished in this picture.)

with homemade Halloween crafts! (I made a wreath for the front door.)

with weekend sleepovers!

with Ellis putting himself down for a nap without anyone knowning!

The Decision to Stay

For the last six weeks or so I have been seriously considering a job offer in Columbus, Ohio. After many sleepless night, numerous conversations, and multiple changes of opinion, two days ago I officially declined the job offer.

It’s been a very stressful time for my family and I. The weeks have been filled with ups and downs and unexpected turns and details that are probably only of interest to a person directly affected by them (i.e. me).

The “decision to stay”, as we’re referring to it around here, has been a big deal for our family. This is the first major decision we’ve had to make as a “family”. When we decided to move to LA after college it was just Ed and I. We weren’t even married. We both made the decision for selfish reasons. The decision to leave LA and move to Atlanta was made more as a couple. We had this suspicious feeling that we could either have “LA” or “us” and I’m happy with our decision.

We when moved to Atlanta we moved here because there weren’t any other options. My parents were here and offered us a bed in the basement. I quickly found a job and within a year and a half of moving to Georgia we were married, expecting our first child, and I was beginning to find my career. We never intended on staying in this city for long, but somehow, after nine years it feels like home.

I thought that since my sister had left and my parents weren’t as local it would be an easy decision to leave. But once we really started weighing the pros and cons of the situation we realized it’s not that easy to just walk away from the life that we’ve built here.

I’m not certain what will happen with my job - and I’m okay with that. I know that for now, and for the immediate future, Atlanta is my home.

And these boys are my life…

Choices and Decisions

Life has been a little bit hectic for me the last couple of weeks.

Actually, life has been a little hectic for my family the last couple of weeks.

The start of 2nd grade for Owen is not going as well as we had expected. He went from being an A/B student last year to one that gets deficiency notices this year. It's frustrating to know what we should not be making a big deal about and what we should actually be concerned about. I've been very happy with Owen's progress in school up until this year and now I'm very annoyed. What has happened since 1st grade ended and 2nd grade started? He seems like the same child to me but academically it's like he's two different kids.

I've got a conference with his teacher tomorrow morning but I'm not too confident that I'll get the answers I'm looking for.

And now to completely change subjects, Ed and I are dealing with some big "family" decisions on the horizon. It's so hard to know what's the best thing for your family. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed just making a decision that only effects me, but when I think about making a decision that could affect my entire family it gets much more confusing. The "gray" area seems to multiple when I think that any decision I make could literally impact the remainder of the boys' life. When I start to think about the impact of my decisions on my extended family I almost feel paralyzed.

Sometimes I wish I could look into a crystal ball and know that the choices I am making are the right ones - not only for me but also for my family.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions...

One Day

Some of my favorite movies of all time are Empire Records, Can’t Hardly Wait, and Nick and Nora’s Infinite Playlist. All of these movies take place over the course of one day when the main character’s lives are forever changed by the events that take place.

I know it might sound a little silly to say that someone’s life can change in just one day, but it can, and my story is a perfect example.

It all started the beginning of my Junior year of high school. I had a boyfriend that I wasn’t really that fond of but that my parents seemed to tolerate. I had gotten myself into some trouble earlier in the summer but my parents trusted the new boyfriend and would let me go out with him. While it was nice that I could get out of the house it was obvious to me that something was missing and it was time for us to break up.

Earlier in the summer I had driven from Tampa, Florida down to Ft. Myers, Florida with my friend Gretchen so that she could finally met a guy she had been talking to online. I’m not sure what we told our parents but off we went, Gretchen and I, on a two hour car drive south to meet a complete stranger. While in Ft. Meyers I met an older boy named Jay. He was the typically bad boy and I was quite smitten.

Over the course of the summer Jay and I shared a few phone calls and lots of letters. (Yes letters, before the use of email was widespread.)

Labor Day weekend of my Junior year I had decided that I was done with my current boyfriend and a trip to Ft. Myers to see Jay was just the thing that I needed. I’m sure I told my parents I would be at Gretchen’s for the weekend and she told her parents the same. We had it all worked out.

Friday afternoon once school got out I chickened out and decided that driving to Ft. Myers for the weekend wasn’t a smart choice to make. To this day I can’t decide why I changed my mind, but I’m happy that I did.

So it was Friday night and I was free! I didn’t know what I would do to keep busy but the first thing that popped into my head was to see what Ed was up to.

Ed was my boyfriend Shawn’s best friend. We had French together and I had been talking to him for the last two weeks about how I wanted to break up with Shawn. I’ll admit it, I was a wimp and didn’t want to be the bad guy. Ed knew all about my plans to go see Jay for the weekend so I felt safe calling him. He invited me to his house and we hung out. I asked him not to tell Shawn (his best friend and my boyfriend) that I was in town.

[Let me just pause for a moment and comment on how manipulative teenage girls can be. I didn’t realize it at the time, but looking back...]

Over the course of the evening my interactions with Ed went from casual to something else. We played Mario Kart on the Super Nintendo and it was obvious that he let me win a few games. We met up with Gretchen and Ed’s buddy John. We went to pick up Gretchen’s paycheck from Sweet Tomatoes.  I sat shotgun as Ed drove us around town. He even let me steer the car as he drove!

While hanging out at Sweet Tomatoes I began to realize that something was happening. It was strange, but Ed was waiting for me to get out of the car and he was standing just a little too close to me.

After Sweet Tomatoes’ we decided that a late night movie would be great. So Gretchen and I, Ed and John all went to see The Crow: City of Angels.  I made sure that Ed and I were sitting beside each other. Once the movie started I kept point at the screen and talking to Ed. Eventually he got the hint and he grabbed my hand. We spent the rest of the movie sitting side my side just holding hands. At some point I must have placed my head on his shoulder and drifted off to sleep. The next thing I remember is Gretchen waking me up and telling me the movie is over.

After the movie we went back to Gretchen’s house with the boys and turned on Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. I think I quickly fell asleep and only remember Gretchen waking me up and saying that the boys had to go home.

I walked Ed out to his car and gave him a long hug. He kissed me quickly on the cheek and whispered, “Let’s just take it slow. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

I remember going to my friend Lindsey’s house the next day and telling her that I thought I could be in love! I know it sounds strange but even in the very beginning I knew that there was something different about this one.

The rest of the weekend was a little bit of a blur. I went home and called Shawn and told him I didn’t think it was working out between the two of us. When Ed called I told him that I had broken up with Shawn and he said he needed to talk to Shawn before anything else took place between us. Ed asked Shawn if he could ask me out, Shawn gave us his blessing and the rest is history!

The Monday of Labor Day weekend we had our first date. He picked me up from my house. I got past the “If you want to go out on a date with a guy we must have met the guy before you go out” rule because Ed had been over to the house to swim a few over the course of the summer. (He was my boyfriends best friend, remember?)

After Ed picked me up we went to the book store. We grabbed a few books that we wanted to “look” at and then sat down in the floor. We had our first kiss amongst the fiction section of Barnes and Nobles. After the book store we went to a movie. We saw “House Arrest” but I don’t remember much about the movie.

After that first date it all happened very easy. We were happy, giddy, and very much in lust!

That first weekend was fifteen years ago! Today we celebrate our 8th wedding anniversary! I love him so much!

Some Days Are Meant to be Lazy

We started out the day with such grand plans. We'd been planning on cleaning up the attic for some time and today seems as good of a day as any. After an easy breakfast of homemade monkey bread and oranges we pulled down all of the toys from the attic and set them in the kitchen so that we could go through them to decide what we wanted to keep and what we could possibly donate.

The kids were super excited about seeing all of the "new" toys.

I'm saving this picture for when he's a teenager!

We had very good intentions of cleaning and sorting but the boys were having such a good time playing we just let them be. I spent some time in the kitchen making some yummy vegetable soup. And the kids just played.

Ellis is obsessed with painted toe nails, so I got out the polish and touched up his toes.

And then he fell asleep on the couch while the polish was drying!

Owen stayed in his PJs all day! Sometimes you just need a day that's carefree - even if you're a kid!

Life Right Now

It's been very busy around our house lately. Here are a few of the things we've got going on...

- Owen is now in his third week of 2nd grade. He's got 14 kids in his class and LOVES his new teacher. We feel very blessed that he enjoys school and seems to excel.

Owen on the first day of school. No, he doesn't have to wear a uniform but this is the outfit he picked out.

- After months of training Ellis has finally gotten a handle on using the potty. We aren't 100% of the way there but we've made a lot of progress in the last week.

- Both of the boys have become obsessed with Katy Perry. They love running around the living room dancing like crazy. Look at cute little Ellis swinging his hips!

- Last weekend we managed to get the baseboards installed in kitchen. We're slowly making progress on all of the different projects around the house. We also managed to get the trim along the bottom of the dishwasher installed, the trim around the closet in our bedroom installed, and the door to the new bathroom hung. We've got a few more rounds of drywall mud to put up and sand down before we can paint and install the floors in the new bath, but once we get the drywall complete the project should finish up quickly. (Famous last words, right?)

Life is good.

The Silent Tree

We had every intention of having a very lazy and low key Saturday. We had debated taking the boys to the pool but neither of them were really excited about that idea and I wasn’t jumping at the thought of spending the day in the heat.

We had talked about going shopping for a new living room rug, which we really need, but our hearts weren’t in it.

I was close to finishing my latest book and Ed was excited that the English Premier League Soccer was playing their first game of the season. The boys were actually playing nicely together in their room, which is sort of rare these days so we just decided to take it easy.

About 10:45AM I decided to run get a quick pedicure while Ed finished the soccer game.

When I got home an hour later no one was in the house. This was strange. I quickly checked the bedrooms but still, no one. My next thought is that everyone must be outside so I walked onto the back deck to this view…

I know it’s a little hard to understand the picture, so let me explain. We had a very large tree fall in our back yard last night. The odd thing is that no one heard a thing. I would have thought that such a large tree falling would have made some loud noise, but we didn’t hear a thing.

The tree hit the corner of the back of the kids fort. The fort had a swing hanging off the back of it. The swing was mounted to a 4 x 4 board. The board was cut in half by the force of the tree falling. I’m fortunate that the house wasn’t hit and that no one was hurt.

After examining the tree I’m still not sure why it fell. It did have some damage from some carpenter ants, but at the base of the tree where it broke to fall over it looked healthy.

Now we have the fun task of trying to get the yard cleared up. We were able to get most of the small branches with leaves off with the help of a hatchet and a small hand saw. A neighbor brought over a gas powered chain saw but we can’t seem to get it to work. Another neighbor let us borrow an electric chain saw so Ed has managed to get the top of the tree cut up. Now we’ve just need to come up with a game plan for the rest of the tree.

I’m thinking we’ll try to rent a chain saw from a hard ware store. Only tomorrow will tell.

I’m still pretty amazed that such a large object could fall in the back yard and we didn’t even notice. Nature is very strange at times.

Is Summer Really Almost Over?

Here in the south the school year seems to start way too early. Owen heads back to school on August 8th. He's only got 2 weeks left before he starts 2nd grade. Where has the summer gone?

We spent the 4th of July holiday visiting our dear friends Uncle Mike and Aunt Michelle Brady in Columbus, Ohio. There aren't many people in the world that I love completely but these two are definitely on the list.

The boys LOVED playing Rock Band.

Owen had a great time at the 4th of July carnival.

Once we got back into town it was time to say farewell to my sister Penny, who left the country to teach in South America for two years. We hosted a going away party for her at our house and we had a great time. She is definitely already missed.

Me (on the left) and my dear Sister.

The rest of July has been filled with pool time, play dates, and me working way too much. I'm looking forward to having a little more routine in our daily life and the hope of cooler weather. Happy Summer!