It's Friday evening after a very long and stressful four day work week. I've missed dinner every night this week and two nights I didn't even make it home before the kids bedtime. Work doesn't always keep me away this much, but when weeks like these happen, I miss my boys so much my heart hurts.
I wonder, is this normal?
I love my job. I love the satisfaction that I get out of completing a tough week like this, but then sometimes I have to wonder if it's worth it...
I often tell myself that I would probably go crazy if I stayed home with the boys every day, but is that just something I tell myself to make it easier for me to leave every morning.
This morning as I was ironing my work clothes my littlest Ellis looks as me and asks, "Mommy, you not be long today, right?" I told him I would try my hardest to be home before bedtime. He looked at me with the saddest eyes and said, "Nooooo, you only be gone a little." He brought tears to my eyes.
I don't really have much of a point, but I just wanted to capture this feeling in the pit of my stomach where I am aching for my kids.
Tomorrow it's back to the office for a few hours but I'm going to bring my oldest Owen with me. Even if he's sitting in my office playing his Nintendo 3DS, at least I'll get to see him. (And I've promised everyone that Sunday we will do something extra special.)